In my
Introduction to Judaism class, one of the books on my Rabbi's book list is "
Becomming Jewish" by Rabbi Ronald H. Isaacs. I glanced through it thinking there wasn't much I was going to get out of it. At the time I was a little miffed because I had a mountain of books, weekly classes that seemed to have no ending date, and besides, I already knew all I needed. After all, I had been through a theological seminary and had an excellent theological education. My father was Jewish, I went to Israel as a kid "to see where we came from," and went to synagogue as a kid. To add to my frustration, my Rabbi said that we weren't in a hurry, there was plenty of time. "We're going to have to speed it up here Rabbi," I thought. "I've got places to go and things to do."
Time marched on and I slowed down ever so slowly. Eventually I began to fall into a different rythm than I had moved in before. I was starting to burrow into the process. I remember one part of the book, "
Becoming Jewish," spoke about the process. During the process a slow transition begins to take place. You begin with a "they, them" attitude. That ever so slowly evolves finally into an "us, we" attitutde. Until one day you don't have to try to be Jewish, you don't have to think about becoming Jewish because you know, in a way that seems to be suddenly, you are Jewish with all you heart, with all your soul, and with all your strength.
I think for me, the transformation happened when I had to leave the nursury (my home synsgogue) and venture out into the Jewish world, with a little help from my Rabbi. My mother died in Victoria, British Columbia, Canada. We had just come through Rosh Hashanah and were heading to Yom Kippur. I would be in a strange city where I knew very few people except my own immediate family there. My Rabbi put me in touch with a synagogue in Victoria where I was very warmly accepted, especially when they learned I was in the grieving process. They asked me if we were going to sit shivah and were willing to support us in that. It was shortly after that when the final transition took place.
The words of the book came back to me. It is a definite process, a journey of the heart that must be different for each person who embarks on the journey. Each comes as an individual, and each comes for different reasons. Some of the reasons and some of the process will be subjects for later blogs. However, I want to finish up this first one with a few observations about myself.
Having gone through seminary and studied theology I know a bit about the subject. I pretty much hated theology in seminary and spent great amounts of time in the library stacks digging into manuscripts that had lain forgotten for fifty, or even perhaps one hundred years or more. These were the books that, for one reason or another, didn't make it into the accepted cannon for the church. To make a long story short, by the time I landed on my Rabbi's door step I had spoken to others about being Jewish and had been rejected. My rabbi listened and then did an amazing thing......... he accepted me.
Since then, there has been an amazing transformation. For the first time in my life I feel truly happy and content mentally and spiritually. I am even loving the study of theology, which I told my wife that it must have been a direct act of God for that to happen.
Baruch ata Adonai, melech haolam, shecheiyanu, v'higiamanu, v'higianu, lazman, hazeh.
